This is my fifth year participating in ArtPrize. Each year has been a different and interesting experience. My ideas for my entries usually come as epiphanies, a thought that hits me and I think,
"hey, I just might be able to pull that off". My ideas tend to evolve as I begin to work out how I'm going to approach the project. This year, I made quite a few changes as I went along. I always
try to think of a way to challenge myself and try to stand out in a crowd. I chose a multimedia approach to challenge my skills by using media I am not used to and not comfortable with. Graphite
and working in pencil has never been my strong suit, and I haven't dabbled with watercolor in a couple decades. I have always preferred acrylic paint because it dries fast and is easy to layer.
If I make a mistake or don't like something, I can easily paint over it. Watercolor is not so forgiving. I did have difficulties with the paper, glue and watercolor and started over on two of
them. I was frustrated at quite a few points and wasn't sure they were going to turn out how I pictured them. They did not, but my work rarely does, but that is the interesting part of the
process.
I chose the subject of butterflies for a few reasons. My work is about the transience of nature, how it can change in the blink of an eye. Butterflies float on the wind and drift from flower to
flower. Most species have incredibly short life spans. They are delicate and their wings get tattered & worn. Butterflies represent change and metamorphosis. My life has changed drastically
in the past few years and all I've gone through makes me feel stronger and more able to adapt to the challenges that blow through my life. I also wanted to pick a subject recognizable to people
of all ages would be able to relate to and draw their own perception from.
Every artist puts highly personal meanings into their artwork. I have always done the same. With many of my recent works, I've chosen titles based on songs that I have an emotional
connection to at that point in my life. While I have my own perception of what they mean to me, I intend that viewers of my art will draw their own perceptions. What an artist struggles with is
to get the inner to the outer and make it universal to mankind.
I'm hoping to take the time to write more about my individual pieces here during ArtPrize.
Artist Statement:
Butterflies represent different concepts to different people. To most, they represent metamorphosis from something lowly into something beautiful. To some they are nothing more than another icky
bug, the pretty wings and fluttering flight path causing the same panic as an angry bee. They are the subject of study and fascination, motifs in human mythology, and symbols of change, feminity,
and serenity. To me, they are tiny, everyday miracles. It amazes me that a tiny, vulnerable caterpillar can perform this incredible change; to form a protective shell around itself, completely
break down into a liquid, and then change, cell by cell into a different creature with different capabilities and a different purpose.
I have found the journey through grief a similar experience. I gave birth to a daughter with Tett Syndrome. I cared for her for 16 years, 2 months and 19 days. She became my world, her smile was
all that mattered. I gave up art for nearly a decade to care for her but found my way back. A little over two years ago, she died suddenly in her sleep. The shock was a nightmare, my life changed
instantly. That year, for ArtPrize 2013, I'd planned a large portrait of my daughter to show the world how bright and beautiful she was. Instead, I showed the world I'd lost what mattered most.
Over the past two years my life has changed drastically, from being a full time single parent with a part time job to having a career and only myself to care for. The one constant has been
continuing my artwork. I have found catharsis at the easel, an avenue to vent my emotions. Grief is a process, a journey. There is shock and disbelief. When that wears off, the real pain sets in,
the realization that every day I wake up is one day farther from my daughter and the life we built together. I chose to keep going, one day at a time, to put myself and my life back together
piece by piece. I feel I have come a long way in two years, I am stronger, stepping up to challenges a part of every day life. I keep pushing forward and I know the journey ahead is unknown.
Every day I wake up is another day to start over.
I chose to paint butterflies from photos I've taken at the Butterfly Rxhibit at the Frederick Meijer Gardens held every year March through April. It was my favorite place to take my daughter
after a long, hard winter of chronic illness and infections. It meant spring was finally here. It is a very peaceful and ethereal place to me.
Music has always had a huge influence in my life and it is always the background to my creative process. I often choose titles based off song titles or phrases. Music can be the universal unifier
of the human experience. We can all find our own meaning in the lyrics of music, even if it wasn't what the artist meant. Many songwriters write with this intent. I attach highly personal
meanings behind my paintings, but also intend the viewer to draw their own perception.
Rett syndrome is a rare neurological disorder that affects mainly girls. Most develop typically for 6 to 18 months and then skill development arrests and breaks down. Rett Sundrome is often
described as Cerebral Palsy, Parkinson's Disease and epilepsy all in one person. For more information, visit www.rettsyndrome.org
The three butterfly paintings are for sale. I also have other paintings for sale. If you are interested, you can contact me through my ArtPrize profile or email me at samestaleshoes@gmail.com